An Eternal Curse

February of 2010 I flew out to San Diego for my grad school interview and I also was in search of a comfortable hole-in-the-wall apartment that I could hopefully call "home" someday.  I was well aware that I would not have the income to legally pay for rent in one of the safer San Diego areas living by myself and since I wasn't too keen to the thought of turning tricks for running water, I was willing to live in the less safe areas of town.  After my short visit to California I returned home feeling confident with my school interview and eager to tell my parents that I found some apartments that would more than likely require me to invest in a weapon of some sort, but that there was hope.

Two months before moving out of Texas and about a week away from stressing myself out of a typically regular and stress-free menstrual cycle, I received a "friend request" on Face Book.  The friendship applicant was a former roommate of mine who I had shared a 3 bedroom condo with 6 years prior to this request.  We had lost complete contact towards the end of my enlistment and I honestly never thought I would speak to him again.  By this point, the last thing on my mind was putting forth the time and energy of rebuilding a friendship that wasn't that significant to start out with.  I accepted his request anyway and didn't hold my breath for much else.

Who would have thought that 2 months after I left-clicked him back into my life I would be traveling back to San Diego and moving into a two bedroom/two bath townhouse with my old roommate gone new Face Book friend?!?  Thinking back to the lack of real friendship that we experienced during our first rooming encounter, neither of us were prepared for what awaited us in the coming months.  Unlike the first time living together, this time we were both single and ready to take on San Diego in the most dangerously yet healthiest way possible.  We instantly began doing absolutely nothing together for the duration of an entire month before my school started and he reported to his new unit on base.  These days that were filled with nothing more than SPF 0 and endless glasses of Sangria, threw our friendship into high gear and motivated us to share our newly tanned bodies with the rest of the single population residing in San Diego.  We both actively started dating people and critiqued our selections for approval or an encouraged early dismissal.  Our friendship couldn't have grown any faster if we had wanted it to.

Fast forwarding this to present day, my roommate and I had already come to terms with the fact that extremely interesting things specifically happen to me that they were well worthy of my starting a blog.  We had already established the idea that our friendship, wrongfully accused of being more intimate than platonic yet guilty for utter awesomeness, was the best foundation for years worth of a successful rooming situation......thus the adoption of the title "Eternal Roommates".

Two weeks ago we added another story to our friendship timeline; my roommate deployed to Afghanistan for the first time with his new unit.  Not only was this going to be a test to my strict refusal of showing tears in public, but it was also a perfect opportunity for God to test my Devil Dog wits.

The night of his deployment farewell, I met up with him and a friend of his on Camp Pendleton at 11:00pm for his estimated 11:30pm bus departure.  Around 11:30pm, and with the buses nowhere in sight, my roommate was one of many anxious Marines collecting his weapons of mass destruction (also known as a rifle and pistol) from the armory.  During this time, my stomach had announced its presence and was strongly encouraging us to walk over to the building that contained the refreshments and drinks for the Marines and their families.

Walking over to the building I was quickly reminded what living on base entailed.  A subtle wilderness smell lingered in the cool air and there was a quiet sound of traffic from the interstate just miles away.  We were greeted by 5 Marine wives sitting at a table set up on one far end of this long and narrow room.  On the opposite end of the room were a few tables with snacks and coolers filled with drinks just calling my tummy's name.  My roommate's friend and I walked over to stock up on an unhealthy midnight snack when it all happened.....

As she was fishing through a cooler of drinks about 10' to the left of me, I was savagely opening a new bag of Chips Ahoy that had to have had a childproof seal installed on it.  As I'm desperately attempting to tear into this packaging, one of Camp Pendleton's un-deployable residents scurried into my limited visual space without a care in the world; a mouse.  Not only was this mouse inches away from my cookies and hands, but it appeared to be the happiest mouse on base.  While other mice would have been running full sprint purposefully avoiding a homicide, this little guy looked to be galloping his way across the table of goodies.  His gallop could have been confused for a skip or possibly even a rain-dance, either way it was clear to see that me and my cookies were in his way.

He twirled himself off the edge of the table and vanished as quickly as his public appearance made me instantly freeze.  You would have thought that this mouse had X-Men powers with the instant cement-like form my body took on the moment I saw him.  In any other situation I would have bolted out of the room and proudly earned my "girl" card, but not this night!  No way, no how was I going to let these Marine wives witness a mental breakdown by a former Marine caused by a mouse all the while theses guys were preparing to go fight terrorism just yards away from us.  "I'm going to act like I didn't just see that" was all I could bring myself to say out loud.  A single female voice from the opposite end of the room heard my comment and replied, "Yes, you just saw that, cause so did I!"  It was clear that this woman had to have been an eagle in her past life simply by her scoping out this mouse like it were her late night feed, because the distance from them to where we were was significantly far. Trying to keep my cool, I managed to peal my feet away from the floor and hurried my friend to leave the room with me.  And to those who are wondering.....yes, I did still take some cookies with me.

We returned back to the farewell grounds and you wouldn't even suspect the traumatic scene I played leading role in just moments ago.  My roommate did eventually deploy at a time that was no where near the original 11:30pm said time.  We shared some final laughs, last minute relationship advice, and one final hug that should have lasted longer.  I turned away, started walking towards my car and never looked back.  That night I experienced the beginning of an absence I have yet to encounter in my prior years, but it has introduced me to knowing what a strong friendship is really about.  One of the two most important promises I've ever made to anyone was to start blogging again, which makes this the first of an 8 month deployment's worth.

Chuy, I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did writing again.

4 ft. for 3 in.

I'm definitely someone who is open to trying new things.  Sometimes I wish I hadn't planted a strange seed in my mind after I'm knee deep into whatever crazy idea I've challenged myself into, but most of the time things work out well.  When I moved out to San Diego this past summer, my sister suggested the fantastic idea of creating a Match. com profile in order to meet new people.  Having been the fearless girl that I am, I proceeded onto creating my profile.  I went on countless dates with many guys who must have been eager to get me caught-up-to-speed on the one thing that Match fails to ask when filling out your page information......,"Why is your ass REALLY single and looking for love online?" It never failed, within the first 20 minutes it was as clear as Bahama waters as to why these poor saps were on Match.  Typically I'd say to myself "just sit here, nod your head, slap a slightly fake smile on your face and enjoy this free meal, dammit."

After coming home with hilarious stories date after date and sharing these comic episodes with my roommate, I finally expired online and got away from the internet dating scene.  Then one afternoon, about 3 months later, I received an email from my good friends at Match.com.  It was like receiving an email from Cupid himself!!  They offered me a free month to come back and attempt to find "true love" once again, as if the first failed attempt wasn't enough of a let down.  The only love I had been finding through these dates was buried at the bottom of wine bottles and coffee mugs!!  But I said "What the hey...do I really have anything to lose?"  Little did I know....my dignity was going to be on the line shortly after this thought.

I received a message on my profile page from a guy who shared with me that he and I had something in common, we both thought my pictures on my profile were pretty.  I took some time to stalk his profile, read his bio, check out his pictures and then wrote him back saying that the feeling was mutual.  A couple of days later I received another email asking if I was going to join him for wine tasting at said given date and time.  This kind of approach caught me off guard.  The "so are we gonna do this or what" tone seemed to grab my interest and I responded back saying, "Yes, I'll meet you there!"  We met up, complimented each other on our scent selections for the evening, similar to the way dogs smell one another for acceptance verification, and the night commenced from there.  After a couple of glasses of wine, my guard came down and I felt that this guy was not going to be like the others.  He was interesting, well spoken, and managed to keep a smile on my face for a good duration of the evening.

Many "firsts" were shared with this guy, not only on the first date, but throughout our entire cupid connection.  After wine tasting we walked the streets in search of more adult liquid refreshments, wound up at a hole in the wall karaoke bar and shared a cigarette (which is not a common thing for me according to my Match.com profile).  This night was the first date to a series of interesting events.

On date number three I was invited over to his place for wine and a movie.  I got dressed up all cute in my favorite black and red dress that does interesting things to the opposite sex.  After I showed up, we sat on his couch, listened to an awesome selection of music and managed to get through a bottle of wine that allowed for conversation to flow just as quickly.  We decided to take a trip down to the store in order to condone one another's alcohol consumption for the evening.  On our way out of the door, we manage to laugh ourselves down the walkway while migrating to the car.  Whatever it was that we were laughing at must have been so funny that it distorted my 20/25 vision.  I completely missed the bright red paint that coated a curb which hugged the parking lot we were walking towards.  Not only did the red paint fail to serve it's purpose with me, but my dress being so long didn't assist in my venture.  As I stepped from the side walk to the parking lot pavement, I failed to realize that there was a difference in height.  I must have traded the wine in for my depth perception, because I ended up tripping and falling all the way down to my knees.  My "match" instantly came to my rescue and helped me up.  I couldn't stop laughing once he pointed out to me that I managed to fall an entire 4 feet off of a curb that literally was no more than 3 inches high.  We brushed me off and continued on our wine mission.  What  my "match" didn't know, was that I was in extreme pain from my knee down to my ankle and then on to my toes.  Having already shown off my walking skills and the lack there of, I couldn't dare put my low tolerance for external physical pain on display.  Plus, what kind of a Marine would I be if I can't drink, walk, fall and then get up and act as if nothing hurt me in my dramatic sidewalk scene?

Luckily blood was not drawn in this fatal embarrassment and we spent some more great dates together afterwards.  I've never shared so many firsts with someone who I met off of a website and had no background information on prior to the first date.  Things tapered off as quickly as they developed, but I can honestly say.....there were more laughs shared in our staggered dates that make me very glad to have met this one.

5.2 miles

Shortly after I moved in, my roommate caught up with me and finally arrived here from Maryland.  He and one of his friends had gotten orders to Camp Pendleton and had arrived in California.  I met his friend, Joe, a couple of nights after they'd arrived and had invited me out to dinner.  Joe and I were in a very similar situation.  We had both moved to California for specific reasons and didn't really have many friends here.  Other than my roommate, we didn't know anyone in San Diego.  All the guys I'd used to work with while on active duty had either moved to other duty stations or had gotten out of the Marines and returned home. 


When I first met Joe, I thought he was pretty funny.  My spidey sense quickly picked up on the fact that he was one drink away from having an addiction.  Joe had informed my roommate and I that he was living at a hotel until he found an apartment large enough for him and his two kids.  We offered him our stadium seating couch as a place to call home until he got on his feet, intending to help save him a dollar or two.  Joe moved in and somehow managed to make the best out of what we'd offered.  


Eventually, I started school, my roommate checked into his new unit and Joe moved out and into his own place.  I got a phone call from Joe on a beautiful Saturday morning saying that his kids were with their mother and he wanted to go cruise down in Encinitas.  I agreed and told him to come pick me up.  My spidey senses had to of hit snooze, because they failed to detect that that decision would soon be a mistake.  


We drove down to Encinitas and walked up and down the strip looking for a place to eat lunch.  We found a tasty little Latin American restaurant and decided to dine there.  Joe is one of those kind of men who doesn't hesitate in spending his money regardless of what responsibilities he has piling up at home (or in his mailbox).  With that being said, we ate delicious meals and drank two bottles of Argentinian Malbec before cashing out with a lunch bill well over two hundred Junior Whoppers ($200).   After this, we walked back up the strip and stumbled into a saloon that was highly populated at 3pm with a staggering 5-6 people.  We decided to join the crowd and made ourselves comfortable at the bar.  If my mom were to have been a fly on the wall, she would probably be licking her front legs and wiping her 2000 sets of eyes to make sure that it was actually her daughter sitting in a place like this during broad daylight.  We sat and talked about the usual topic of this time of year....football.  The season was right around the corner and we were swapping favorite players and teams.  


The jut-box behind me was playing a mixture of Bob Marley and some 80's hits that I don't miss much of.  The flooring, and what seemed to be every other piece of furniture in this place, was made from old dark wood and red leather.  The air was dusty and if I hadn't known any better, I would have been expecting 
Mr. Furley to walk though the front door at any given moment.  After we both had gotten through a few drinks I don't remember what was said or even the topic at that, but Joe then made a shocking statement that instantly changed the atmosphere.  He firmly stated that I was a "B*tch".  Thanks to my blood alcohol content, I found myself having quite the delayed reaction.  He must have thought that I didn't hear him, so he repeated his thought and added a very colorful word to it that rhymes with "tucking".  In my hazy world, I felt as if our thirsty counterparts in the room as well as the jut-box itself, had all stopped dead in their tracks and turned their attention towards me.  I had one of two choices to make at this time.  Either A, knife-hand Joe into an early slumber, or B attempt to look classy and walk out of this modern day "Regal Beagle" with some dignity.  


With "Classy" being my middle name, I downed my Grey Goose and pineapple cocktail, fished my cherry out from under the ice and walked out of there.  Slightly confused as to how the rest of the Encinitas population was not drunk at this time, I began walking towards my side of town.  By this time, the sun was still shining and my vision was still slightly impaired.  I remembered that Joe was so into his cocktail that I don't even think he realized that I had left.  About 3/4 of a mile up the road, I'm confident that I could have passed a DUI test with flying colors.  The sun was beginning to go down and I was not even half way home yet.  I don't really know what I was thinking when I decided to walk home, but I'm certain that alcohol mixed with my pride had something to do with it. I called my roommate to vent and somewhere along the lines asked him to come scoop me up, but he was in LA and far out of reach.  At this point, a few thoughts went through my mind....


1) You're a Marine and this is just a walk to burn off the calories you inhaled.


2) Call a cab and take the easy (smart) way out.


3) It's in Joe's best interest to never cross my path again. 


So I did what any alcohol induced Marine would do in this situation...I kept hoofin' it home.  By the time I got home it was 8:30 pm, I was damp with sweat and about half of the skin under both my feet had transformed into two huge blisters.  Ironically, as I was unlocking my door, Joe's phone call came through on my cell.  When I answered, I didn't know who I was more upset with.  Joe for being a douche lord and disrespecting me or at myself for being so prideful and walking home in flip flops.  Joe's next question easily made me launch all my anger on him.  "Where are you?" was probably the last thing he should have said to me.  After getting an ear full, I hung on him and tippy-toed myself to the shower.  


The following day I drove down to the bar where my walkathon party of one had started and measured the distance.  5.2 miles in leather flip-flops, jeans a tank top and Grey Goose for mouth wash is not a good idea.  Joe insisted in calling me to inform me that he believed he had been drugged at the bar which is why he didn't remember anything, especially calling me a B and letting me walk home.  I told him that I honestly felt he was an idiot for believing that anyone in that bar wanted to drug him as opposed to drugging oh I don't know....THE GIRL!?!?!?!  


We stopped talking for a while after this incident and Joe's relationship with alcohol grew stronger.  My pride is still in tact, but next time this happens, I'll probably go with my first option of knife-handing the guy.  I'm sure my feet would appreciate that as well.  

Can You Hear Me Now?: Now It's Called "The 8"

Can You Hear Me Now?: Now It's Called "The 8": "July 17, 2010 was exactly 5 years from the date I maneuvered my Penske moving truck onto the curb in front of my parent's house in Texas aft..."

Now It's Called "The 8"

July 17, 2010 was exactly 5 years from the date I maneuvered my Penske moving truck onto the curb in front of my parent's house in Texas after having driven 24 hours straight from San Diego. This also was the day I found myself stuffing my SUV with all of my belongings preparing to migrate back to the west coast.  The only difference this time, was that my A-driver was my dad.  


Having my parents as roommates after moving back in with them upon graduating from undergrad was not as bad as I thought.  I managed to create just enough distance between us all by disappearing for runs in the park, lunch with friends and dinner shifts at work.  But now I found myself in extreme close quarters with my dad riding shot gun, my rear view mirror reflecting clear blue plastic containers and cardboard boxes that had been used one too many times and the sound of tarp flapping in 80 mile per hour winds as it slowly ripped apart from the mattress it was protecting while strapped to the top of my car.  This was probably my 5th or 6th time making this drive and I knew that I could get to San Diego in 22 hours(20 if Highway Patrol didn't interrupt my commute), but I didn't realized that I would be stuck in this jail cell on wheels for the next 26 instead.  


My relationship with my dad has always been great, but my mom was the parent who taught my sister and I to drive for good reason.  My dad is the type of man who the school systems should personally thank for not having decided to become a teacher.  It never failed growing up, if my dad were in the position of leadership in a project around the house that required more than two hands, someone ended up in tears with my dad yelling and requesting a new assistant.  Typically I was my dad's helper, but it never was as easy as it possibly could have been if I could only read my dad's mind.  Which ironically seemed to be something that he would growl at me when I didn't know what he wanted me to do and standing there waiting for direction was the wrong approach.  Luckily, this was my car, my drive, my money and my radio.  I knew that this trip was going to be interesting the moment we pulled away from my parent's house. 


We didn't make it 30 miles outside of Houston, and no where near sunrise, the first time we pulled off of I-10 to re-secure my mattress to the roof of my car.  The wind had started to tear the plastic tarp apart and we were expecting rain on much of our way out west.  This would be the first of at least seven stops to re-hogtie my mattress.  Somewhere between Texas and New Mexico I was certain that my mattress would blow right off of my car as the noise from the flapping tarp was overwhelming.  When we pulled over for gas at one point, we saw that my mattress was tied so tight to my car that the wind had pushed it slightly upward into the shape of a lower case "n".  How we made it to San Diego like that, I just don't know.  


We managed to drive through hours of storms in West Texas, witnessed a double rainbow in New Mexico, baked in the 119 degree heat in Yuma, where I burned my forearm on the side of my car as my dad yelled at me to "pull the rope tighter on my side of the damn mattress" and then finally put my car in "park" in front of my new home around 8:00 pm. pacific standard time.  This road trip was the first time I hadn't been the lead singer in a continuous private concert, with the windows rolled down and a 6-pack of water sitting front row next to me while I sang every Rascal Flatts song known to man at the top of my lungs.  It also was the first time that my dad's snoring became an additional instrument to my Dierks Bentley play list.  If the new California roadway lingo wasn't enough of a reminder that I was now officially a Texas transplant, an awkward conversation I soon would have with my new landlord would have immediately reminded me of where I had ended up.  

When dragging ourselves 50 feet up the driveway and to my door, you could feel a light breeze and smell the ocean water in the air as well as hear a steady "hmm" from the cars on "the 5" less than a half mile away.  All I wanted at this point was to unload my car, shower, put on my favorite TX A&M pj's and pass out on my "n" shaped mattress.  Little did we know, that wasn't going to happen.  After searching for the key in the dark, which my Craigslist produced landlord had hidden so well you'd think the Titanic's blue heart diamond was used as the key chain, and failed to locate it; she finally offered to drive over and let me in.  I didn't think this would be the way we would first meet, but I also didn't think my landlord would be such the hippie as she turned out.  We walked into my new place only to discover that the power had not been turned on and that the windows hadn't been opened in quite some time.  We were standing in a dark living room feeling the hot stale air as drips of sweat beaded on my neck and trickled down my spine.  I began unloading my car while my dad looked for the main breaker to the house.  Awkwardly hidden in a corner of the detached garage, he found the breaker and we had light!!  When we walked back into the house I noticed a thermostat box on the wall.  I played with it for a little bit and noticed that much like my cranky temper, the house was not cooling off.  I called my landlord once again, and this time asked her how to turn on the A/C.  She was quiet for a short second then confusingly asked, "What's that?"  This was my wake-up slap in the face.  I now live in Southern California where the water is blue, the air is crisp and people don't know what "A/C" means.  This also became my Que. to get right back into my car and make my first trip to Wal-Mart at 11:45 pm for a much needed room fan.  


This officially was the start of my new chapter in life....